the wizards
by enelyx7
Summary: wizard of oz parody. i guess. lenalee is a little girl here. no pairings, i hope.
1. komurin killed the witch?

lenalee li lived with her only brother in a small farmhouse on a wide stretch of flat land.  
there was no other house in their immediate area, so she was sometimes lonely.  
but her brother found something in the fields one day that looked like a golden bird.( or bee... maybe)  
he gave it to lenalee, and she has not been separated from it since.

one day, while lenalee and timcanpi ( that's what she named it, her brother wanted 'komurin', but she said he already had a pet named komurin.  
he was sort of shocked that she knew, but he didn't tell her about it. he dropped the subject whenever it came up, though)  
anyway, they were playing in the fields one day, when her brother, komui, rushed out of the house and yelled to them, "lenalee! get tim and come here! quickly!" he seemed quite panicked.  
lenalee did as she was told, and she started for the house. he rbrother had already disappeared from her sight. it looked to her as if he went inside the little hut.  
at that very moment, they heard thunder from the distance. a storm was coming, she thought.  
she was about to call her brother, but something suddenly leapt out from behind them and surprised both her and timcanpi. he(it is a he, right?) started to squirm in her hands.  
all she could say at the moment, looking at the massive spider-looking-rbot-thing-with-a-beret, was, "k-komurin"

the clouds were over their heads now, and it started to rain.  
komurin was just standing there, looming over lenalee, who was clutching timcanpi tight now.  
tim didn't even try to move anymore.  
komui came out of the house. "lenalee, where"  
he was stopped short by the sight of komurin, who was also looking at him, quite strangely.  
by the time any of them could react, a cyclone had already made it's way over to them (look, i know it's all a bit fast, but hey, i don't really know much about this. sorry)  
lenalee, being quite small, was also very light.(she is probably 5 or 6 in this story, 'k)  
she was, and i quote, lifted off the ground by the wind quite easily.

komurin was also lifted off the groun although not as easily.

komui wasn't. he was in the house, being sheltered. i guess it was a tough house. even if it was a hut and all.

"nii-san"  
"lenalee"

"ugh... wh-where am i? nii...san"  
lenalee rubbed her eyes as she sat herself up. tim was fluttering around her head.  
it looked as if they were in a forest somewhere.  
"tim?... what happend to... nii-san"  
she almost yelled. she remembered now. she was pulled through the hurricane. then she also remembered something quite vague, timcanpi suddenly got bigger, huge, actually, and... swallowed her?  
she thought about it." but, we can't be inside of you, can we, tim? i mean, here you are!" she smiled at the golem, even in her unfortunate situation.  
it nodded in response.

frush! rustle! rustle!

someone popped out of the nearby bushes.

lenalee shouted ,"nii-san!" in the hope that it was her brother, but it wasn't him.  
instead, it was a tall, dark man in a dinner suit.

she was kinda disapponted.

"nii...san?? that's not me, is it?" the man looked at lenalee disbelievingly.pointing at himself.  
lenalee blushed."i- i'm sorry, i thought that..." she stammered.

he paid no mind to it, and smiled at her. then he bent down in a sitting position and pointed at something behind her.  
"little girl, is that thing yours?" he asked.  
she looked back.

she was horrified at the sight.  
there was komurin, all beaten and broken up from the hurricane, and underneath it,  
was a pair of feet.

lenalee thought the worst.

"oh no!! i-i'm so sorry! what happened? i didn't mean to--!!" lenalee gasped.  
she started to cry.  
the man flusterred, he wasn't good with kids. his luck that there was one in front of him, a little girl crying.  
"h-hey! it's okay! it's not like it's your fault, or anything! in fact, it's pretty good that she's gone now! please stop"  
he pleaded, trying to reassure her.  
then she clung onto him, still crying.  
"AAAAHHH--!! " he yelled in surprise. then he sighed.  
he was being used as a handkerchief now. she sniffled.  
" hey, my name's Tykki Mikk. i'm a noah. what's your name, little girl"  
he wasn't sure if she was gonna answer, but he tried putting up conversation anyway.  
"i-i'm... lenalee li..." she atarted. he was a bit surprised.  
"i'm a... chinese...i'm sorry about your friend... i didn't know that komurin would...sniff"  
snot dripped out from her nose now he got a handkerchief from his pocket and wiped her face.

she blew her nose on it.  
"gesundheit"  
"s-sorry..."

"no! no! i should be the one saying sorry! i'm making you cry when i should be thanking you!  
what kind of gentleman am i? i appologize." lenalee was confused now.  
"but your friend..." she trailed.  
"oh, her. that's not my friend. i'll be damned if she was.she's my enemy. i mean, if somebody kept you and some of your kind in custody for a pretty long time giving you insane working hours, no pay, pretty crappy living quarters (literally! i swear, there were little metropolitans under our sink!  
think about what was under our bed!) and no vacation, then that person must have ben an enemy! cause if that was a friend, then who needs enemies in the first place?  
anyway, getting back to my point, with her gone, you, my dear lenalee, have set me and others free. thank you very much. i am forever in your debt"  
tykki bowed to her.  
lenalee, thinking that she understood now, asked," was she you wife?"

tykki fell to the ground hard.

he reviewed on the definition he gave her, and true enough, it did sound like some wives,(but i'm not pointing fingers or anything, okay, this is all merely fiction, and therefore not true!! )  
"nooo! of course not! i'd never be married to the woman! i'm still single, for goodness sake!" he shook his head and laughed.

awkward silence

lenalee looked at their surroundings. tim fluttered aroud.  
"oh! i forgot! your prize for... um," he looked at her, then remembered that he really liked his shirt and didn't want it to get ruined by more snot.  
"i-i mean... a gift! that's right! a gift for you! can you stand here please? yes, right there. and dont turn around, okay"  
lenalee wondered what he was doing.  
he went over to where komurin was, and looked at the dead witch's feet.  
then, slowly and carefully, he took of the shoes that she was wearing.  
after he did that, the feet disappeared, as if they were never there.  
if he remembered correctly, there was supposed to be some awesome power in the shoes.  
but he didn't know what.he gave them to her.  
she was surprised."wow! new shoes? where did you get this?" she forgot about the witch completely.  
she tried them on. they were a perfect fit.she was excited, she hadn't had anything new in a long while.  
she thanked tykki, who was glad he could make her smile so nicely.  
"i... found it on... Ebay!" he exclaimed.  
lenalee wondered what 'Ebay' was, but she didn't care.  
"i'm so lucky! a new pair of shoes! thank you so much! you're just like...nii..san"  
her voice dropped. tears were forming again.

he knew where this was going, and prepared another handkerchief. then he asked,  
"do you... miss him?" he gave her the handkerchief. she took it thankfully. she blew her nose on it, the replied,  
"he's the only family i have, i don't know what i'd do without him"  
she sobbed into the handkerchief.

he sighed again. then he said, a bit unsure of himself, " well, if you really want to see him... i guess there's a way"  
she lit up."really? how"  
"well, there's this awesome wizard who lives in emerald city. i bet he can get you back home to your brother, wherever that is." he reasured.  
lenalee answered, "i live in china. can he really bring me back home"  
"i guess so. he is a wizard, after all. and i heard that he came from the sky too. maybe from where you are"  
"okay! so where is emerald city? it sounds like a nice place, to be named after a jewel!" she asked him.  
he had only been there once, before he was imprisoned, and that was a looong time ago, so he didn't know what it loked like now. but he told it to her from memory.  
"it's a wonderful place. everything is green, the shops are green, the ground is green, the buildings are green, even the sky is green!  
and the women there are beautiful beyond imagination! albeit green"  
he pondered on that once, but gave up.  
"just follow that yellow brick road over there." he pointed to a path just a little out of the forest.  
lenalee looked out. then she said," okay. are you coming with me?" she looked at him hopefully.  
he stood up.  
"unfortunately, i"  
he looked when he shouldn't have.  
lenalee was already preparing for a situaton like this. she knew his weakness, and she also didn't want to go anywhere alone, even if she had tim with her.

he could not escape this.

lenalee was strolling along the brick road and humming to herself with timcanpi hovering nearby, trying to keep her spirits up.  
tykki was walking along the little girl utterly defeated.

they were walking for over an hour until they heard horrified screams from in front of them.

"aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!! m-m-m-m-move asiiiiiiiiiiide"  
the owner of the screaming came crashing toward them on her broomstick.

just before she could collide with them, the broom suddenly shot upwards and knocked her off onto the ground with a loud "THUMP!"

there was glitter and dust everywhere.  
"cough! cough! i'm so...cough! sorry, about this... are you...cough! hurt, anywhere?" the rather pretty, yet tired looking woman asked. she was wearing an old-fashioned black dress with her hair in a mess, like she'd just woken up, and forgot to comb it. for a long time, too. she also had a giant clock strapped to her back.

lenalee coughed from the dust, and replied, "we're fine. but, how about you? you're the one who crashed"  
"yeah, are you okay? looked like it hurt"  
tykki added in.

"oh, yes, yes, i'm fine! i'm used to this happening all the time! hahahaha--aaaaahh"  
the woman shot up but forgot she had a clock on her back and was pulled back down again.

crash!

"oh, dear... my clock..." she got up more slowly this time and managed to balance the clock.  
"by the way, are you... Lenalee Li"  
she looked at lenalee, hopefully.

"yes, i'm lenalee, and you...are..." she trailed.  
"oh! i'm so sorry! i forgot to introduce myself! how improper!i'm so sorry! i'm... miranda! miranda lotto! the good witch of the north! and you being here must mean..." miranda looked at lenalee, then at tykki. then she looked down at lenalee's feet. she turned pale.  
"oh dear, oh dear, oh dear! i'm too late! umm, uhh... wh-what should i do now... uh..." she took out a script from somewhere behind her and began to frantically read it, missing some pages in the process and picking them up again.

tykki and lenalee sweatdropped.

"uhmmm, uhhhhh... oh! here it is!" she pointed to somewhere on the paper and murmured something about 'shoes' and eyed tykki.  
then she looked at the paper again and sighed.  
"well, i guess that's all i can do..." then she walked up to lenalee, putting the paper back from wherever she got it, and murmured an apology.  
"please excuse me." she said, then she kissed lenalee on the forehead.  
"you now have my blessing. from now on, no harm, or evil shall befall you"  
miranda chanted, and smiled at her.  
lenalee was awed. a kiss on the forehead could really do all that?  
"thank you, miranda." lenalee bowed in courtesy.

"oh, no. don't thank me, i'm just doing my job. and, good luck on your trip to emerald city! i hope you find what you're looking for!" and with that, the good witch of the north looked for her broomstick, spotted it some miles down the road, where lenalee and tykki just came from, and left. lugging around the huge grandfather clock behind her.

"what a strange woman." tykki said, as he lit himself a cigarette.  
they were walking along the road again, talking about what just happened.  
"true, but she seemed nice to me. she even gave me her blessing!" lenalee replied.  
"can a kiss on the forehead really protect you from any harm at all? then i could have just done that, and you wouldn't need me here." he sighed, and let some smoke escape.  
"yeah, but in your case that would look like sexual harrasment." a voice from the fields they were passing by,said.

the voice surprised them.  
lenalee jumped, and tykki took a fighting stance. timcanpi hid in lenalee's hair.  
"who's there?" tykki called out. there were only 3 sentient beings here, he thought. well, two if you didn't count tim, but i'm pretty sure he's sentient.

"oops, sorry about that. butting in on your conversation. i'm over here!"

lenalee looked around, then pointed to something in the cornfields.  
"tykki, look! a scarecrow"  
"lenalee, this isn't the time to be pointing at scare--crows?" he was surprised. the scarecrow in the middle of the field was smiling and trying to wave at them. but in vain, since it's arm was tied up to a cross shaped pole. he dropped his stance. i can't believe i got scared by that. he thought.

the scarecrow, who had an eyepatch over his right eye, messy orange hair and was wearing a scarf with a black long-sleeve shirt and pretty worn out slacks said,  
"why don't you believe it? i totally took you by surprise there! of course you'd get cautious!" he laughed to himself.  
tykki got pissed at his remark, but was surprised by it.  
"it was written all over your face y'know. don't need to be a mind-reader to know what you're thinking." the scarecrow replied with a smirk. lenalee was already beside the scarecrow by the time tykki started moving toward him.  
she was amazed that he could talk, and was looking wide-eyed at it.  
the scarecrow was about to make a sarcastic remark, like, 'take a picture, it'll last longer', but she was really cute, and it would be rude to say it to a little girl. so he just introduced himself.  
"hi i'm lavi! nice to meet ya"  
lenalee jerked back to reality, and introduced herself too.  
"i'm lenalee li! that man over there is tykki mick, and this one is timcanpi." she said, pointing to each respectively. then she asked. "are you really a scarecrow? how come you can talk"  
lavi smiled a big toothy grin.  
"that's... a secret"  
lenalee pouted.  
then he added, " by the way, i'm stuck up here as you can see. can you help me down? heheh"  
" why? if you tell us who you are and why you're up there in the first place, then maybe we can help." tykki said, curious about what he was too.  
"hmmmm..." lavi frowned, then after thinking about it, he told them.  
"i'm a bookman, well, a junior bookman, actually. bookmen are people who record history as it really happened, every little detail of it, so sometimes we have to join the army to understand what's happening." he elaborated for their benefit as he figured they probably didn't know what a bookman was. and he was right. there was a look of understanding on their faces as he finished explaining it.  
"anyway, my mentor, bookman senior, got pissed at me. and he was really angry this time, so he... put me up here and had me be a scarecrow for a while since he said that's the 'only useful thing you can do with that stick of yours'. tch, that damn panda doesn't know what he's talking about." lavi finished.  
lenalee was still curious, and asked, "what did you do that pissed him off so bad, he had to put you up there for"  
lavi blinked.  
"for what...? well, i... don't really remember, i mean, i've pulled so many pranks on him, i guess he just got fed up with me for a while. he said he was gonna come back when i'm 20, though... so that's 2 years from now."

they all remained silent.

"so... can you help me off now?"

"oh! yes! sorry about that!" lenalee jumped to her feet and went around him to untie his feet.  
tykki just got up, and tried to untie his hands.

lenalee finished before him, so when he had finally done the last knot, lavi fell over on his back.

"ooowwwww"  
"are you okay?" lenalee asked.  
"wow, that must have hurt." tykki gaped.

lavi got on his feet, and patted off some dust.  
"hey, thanks! can i ask where you guys are going, by the way?" he looked at them.  
lenalee replied, "we're going to emerald city to see the wizard"  
"the wizard"  
"that's right"  
"hmm, can i come?"


	2. the scarecrow moves, and tykki leaves

"come? why?" tykki asked. curious as to why anybody would come along on their trip.  
"well... since you asked... maybe to see 'im for myself? it's a bookman's job, after all. and there are pretty girls there, right? all the more reasonto go, then"  
lavi smiled again. his ulterior motive revealed.  
lenalee just smiled, and tykki sighed.  
then he thought of something.  
"hey, scarecrow. can you fight"

"huh"  
"come on! answer already! can you fight or not"  
"well... yeah. but what does that"  
"allright! since youre going to emerald city as well, then i place you in charge of protecting the little princess!" tykki said, gesturing at lenalee. then he patted lavi on the shoulder and looked at lenalee, then said, "well, it has been a good time travelling with you, little girl, but i'm afraid i must go now. duty calls." and with that, he vanished in a swarm of black butterflies.  
"hey! wait! where are you-- agh, get offa me!" lavi waved the butterflies away.  
" aww... tykki left. his job must be really important to him." lenalee said, looking at the butterflies spreading out.  
lavi then picked up a miniature hammer from somewhere on the ground and put it in his pocket.  
"so, we better get a move on, huh? it'll be dark soon. there's a house just up the road, we can go there to rest"  
he said to an amazed lenalee.  
"wow, you can see that far with just your left eye"  
"i'm a bookman! were supposed to spot things from far away! and because i've been there before. heheh"  
then they started to walk through the fields toward the house. when they got there, it was pretty home-y, though a bit dusty from the lack of use for some time, it had 4 rooms. the bathroom, bedroom, living room, and a kitchen.  
"hm, you're probably hungry after walking the whole day, so help yourself to the kitchen. i guess the fridge still has food in it. canned goods and stuff. this used to be a safehouse after all." lavi told her.  
so, they cooked and ate whatever they could find, cup noodles and other stuff,(amazing the place still had electricity) then they went to sleep.  
lenalee and tim in the bedroom and lavi on the couch.

when lenalee woke up the next day, she heard some groaning from outside the house. lavi was still asleep, so she quietly went outside with tim.

they wandered to the direction of the groans, and found a person who looked like a samurai, on the ground, bleeding from his side, and glaring at them.

lenalee was alarmed, but a bit shocked to move, so the man, who had pretty long hair, maybe longer than hers, said to her, in a mocking sort of voice, "take a picture, it'll last longer"  
lenalee came back to her senses then, and said,"oh, i'm sorry! do you need help? should i go back and get help? wait, you shouldn't move around like that!!" he tried to sit up, but almost fell again if she hadn't supported him.  
"i'm... fine. just go and get some bandages or something and hurry up! i'm bleeding, you know." he ordered.  
"right away! tim, you stay here and watch over him, 'k?" and then she ran to the house again.

"ah, lenalee! where were you? i've been looking all over the place! nearly gave me a heartattack!" lavi exclaimed.  
"no time! it's an emergency! do we have some bandages around here?" lenalee said, desperately.  
"hey, wait! who's injured, and where"  
"just come with me! tim is watching over him!" lenalee said, after she found the bandages and ran out again. lavi followed her, then closed the door behind them.

they finally got to where the samurai was, and lenalee then proceeded to bandage him up. lavi helped.  
and when they were done, he was as good as new.

"thank goodness it wasn't a serious injury. but still, you shouldn't move like that, yu-chan." lavi told their patient, who was making an effort to get up. then he glared at lavi."what did you call me"  
and, he said this in such an ominous voice that lavi had cowered behind lenalee.

"he's scary..."

"so... what's your name?" lenalee asked. patting lavi's head.

"...call me kanda." he stopped glaring menacingly at lavi and just looked at lenalee instead.

"okay, kanda. umm, if it's not too much trouble, can you tell us what you were doing here and why you were injured?"

"..."


	3. kanda's story

"yeah, i want to know about that too, yu- i mean, k-kanda..." lavi hid behind lenalee again.

"che, fine, since you helped me, i guess i'll tell you." kanda answered and then took a seat on a pretty big boulder.

lenalee sat down on the round near him, tim landed on her head, and lavi slumped behind lenalee.

"i'm an android. my master, or creator, made me for the use of combat. i was supposed to be the perfect android. a 'destroyer'... but.  
while i was here on a mission, i was suddenly attacked by some level three akuma..."

"woah, woah, woah! hold on a minute! level three akuma?! no wonder you're so beat up!" lavi interjected.

"che." kanda glared at him again, but lavi didn't seem to mind, since lenalee was asking a question.

"what are 'akuma'?" she looked at him cluelessly.

"oh, the akuma are monsters here in oz. maybe you don't have any where you come from. i'd say you're lucky you've never heard of them before, much less seen one. they're horrible"  
lavi replied.

"oh.  
um, sorry, kanda-san. please continue."

"che. anyway, i beat them up, but that's not when i got this injury. after i defeated them, another one came out from hiding. this time a level 4."

"a level 4? this is the first time i've heard of one!"

"yeah, and they're insanely powerful too. i... wasn't able to defeat it, it escaped. and it took something of mine. something very important, and i must retrieve it.  
so now, if you'll excuse me." and he rose up from the rock.  
"i'm going to hunt down and kill that akuma now, and complete my mission."

"hey, where are you gonna go, yu-chan? do you know where it went?"

kanda glared at lavi, but halted.  
he was right, he had no idea where the level 4 went, or where it came from.

then lenalee jumped in.

"hey, why don't you come with us, kanda-san! maybe you'll find that akuma and get your item back! or you can ask the wizard where they are!"

"wizard? are you going to emerald city?"

"yeah. it's gonna be quite some time before we reach there. and we might need a bodygaurd on the trip! well? it's the least you could for her, since lenalee sort of rescued you, and all. yu-chan. oh, by the way, i'm lavi, and the golden golem is timcanpi." lavi introduced for the first time.

kanda unsheathed his sword.then he pointed it at lavi and glared at him.  
" this is mugen. you will die by this edge if you keep calling me 'yu-chan'." mugen glinted.

"h-hi, m-mugen! what a pleasure meeting you, i think..." lavi staggered backwards. kanda put mugen back in it's sheath. then he turned to lenalee, and said,"fine, i will accompany you, and protect you on your journey if necessary. but once i finish my objectives, i'm leaving. got that"  
"that's a bit rough, yu-chan"  
"that's okay. thank you for accompanying us, kanda-san. i place our well being in your hands." lenalee bowed slightly.

"kanda"  
"eh"  
"just kanda is fine"  
"okay then, kanda."

"all right! yu-chan's joining us! let's hope you won't be using mugen often, eh?"

"che"  



End file.
